Friday, May 20, 2011

Halp I is being raptured!

By Cassandra Speaking.

So by this time tomorrow the Rapture will be underway.  At least if you believe the lunatic ramblings of an almost 90 year old repeat failure of a prophet.  Twice before he's predicted the date of the rapture with utterly NO success whatsoever.  For a while he was claiming the world was going to end in 1988.

We see how well that went over now didn't we?  Wasn't it so much fun?

Apparently it was so much fun he went back to his magic book and saw the error of his ways and predicted it was actually going to end in March of 1994.  While the early 90's so the implosion of the tech bubble, and resulting economic slide on wall street, 1994 was otherwise unremarkable.  During March he said there was some leeway in the numbers and waited all month for the end to come.

It didn't.  Again!

So here we are now on the eve of the most famous undate in history.  Tomorrow he claims is really, truly, without question, the end of history.  Thus, an undate, since no one worthy of remembering will be around long to remember it.   "Good by my friends, I'll see you all in the great beyond."  I like so many other "people" haven't bothered to pay any of my bills, or put my affairs in order, because the entire world ends tomorrow.  Not just tomorrow, but right after work at 18:00 hours local time.

I hope you'll all join me here Sunday morning as the reports start coming in of people all over the globe drinking the sacramental koolade because they missed the bus.

I predict that tomorrow will go down in history as a famous date.  The date that Harold Camping will forever be known as a three time loser.  You see he's the very self important little man who has predicted the last two spectacularly failed end of the world dates.  Tomorrow at around 19:00 local time, when nothing at all has happened, he'll end up being ranked right up there with "Chicken Little" and the "Boy Who Cried Wolf."

I feel kinda bad for Harold and his followers, because even I know that God has made it clear that the end will come without warning, fanfare, public appearance spots, or any media coverage whatsoever.

I as a Buddhist and former ascended master, who has studied many of earths religions, and was last "risen up" or "raised up" sometime before Christ came, know that there's more than one way to scramble an egg.   Or, perhaps a better way of putting it?  It's fairly simple these days to get from New York to San Fransisco.  There are as many, or more ways to get from here to there than there are days in a month.  So too with reaching the next plane of existence.  After all I've been there, and back.

I'm sorry but it's the height of hubris for one insignificant little man, who has somehow more money and motivated self importance than brain cells, to decide he knows when the end is going to come.  Especially given the numbers involved.  Right now there are around 6 BILLION (with a B) human beings on Earth.  I know for a fact that some one sixth of all those humans follow one of the many flavors of Buddhism, I mean there at least a billion Buddhists on Mainland China for example.  That doesn't count the rest of South East Asia, Japan, and significant parts of India.  Then we have those of the Hindu faith, which is similar in many ways and flavors to Buddhism, and if nothing else, certainly NOT Christianity.  Then there are our Muslim brothers and sisters, who while the don't believe as we do, certainly don't believe what Harold does.  So for good measure lets throw in the Catholics who KNOW, because God has told them so, that no one will know when the end is coming.  Oh, and while we are adding people in who don't believe, lets add the Jews, Protestants, Baptists, Wiccan's, and who else for good measure?  How about the Krishnas?  Who else?

Well see that's the thing, the vast majority of people don't believe what Harold does.  They believe their God of gods doesn't work that way.  Many of them believe a harbinger of the end times, but not a set date, will include quite a show, a new world order, the coming of the Anti-Christ, and much more.  While many have claimed that Sarah Palin is the Anti-Christ, I don't think she's smart enough for that.  Sorry Sarah, but your just not smart enough for that.  That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it.  It's also my opinion that Harold Camping is an idiot.  I mean he's even dumber than Sarah Palin, and you really have to work hard to be that vapid.

But I digress.  Yes, I'm a Buddhist, but I'm not a perfect Buddhist, and admit so much of this tome is NOT right speech.  Then again, it's not supposed to be, since this is only my tiny little irrelevant opinion, and I freely admit having fallen from grace, ON PURPOSE, after having already once achieved ascension.

So Sunday afternoon as you're relaxing enjoying a day off, please feel free to join this me in saying "Harold Camping, You ARE The weakest link, Goodbye."

This is Casandra Speaking for Forward Views, all of tomorrows news, today.

No comments: